little MANnerism throw back

Having a newborn and a 5 year old in the house brought this one back...

When Little Man was born, Little Miss was 6.
I was changing his diaper one day and she was looking inquisitively at his parts just over my shoulder.  Recognizing her curiosity we started talking about private areas of our bodies and wanting to always use proper language I told her that Little Man had a penis but that it was his and not to be bothered by anyone.

A few minutes went by when it dawned on me she might not know what her parts were called.  So I asked "Do you know what your private area is called?"

Without skipping a beat and almost dismissively she says...

"Oh mine?  Mine's just a regular."

And let me tell you, that just made the word vagina sound so ridiculous it took me a few days to circle back and correct her.

-McGee

little MANnerisms

Little Man and I were driving past the local cemetery.
He was asking me loads of questions...

Will Bean have to be buried here since she was born here?
Do we know anyone buried here?
How are people buried?

Then he busts out with this gem...

Little Man:  Mom, when I die I don't want to be buried.
Me:     What do you want to have happen instead?
Little Man:  I want to be a prop.
Me:     A prop?  Like for a movie?
Little Man:  No.  Like for a Halloween decoration at the house.

(I'm dying at this point)

Me:    What would we do with you when it's not Halloween?
Little Man:  Just put me in the attic, or the basement.  I just think my body would be lonely if you buried it in the cemetery.

Seriously.  A prop?
I love this kid.

-McGee

little MANnerisms

Little Man says the funniest things,

But sometimes his siblings take the cake.

Bean was just barely home and the kids were all over her.

All of a sudden she tensed up,

Her face went red,

Her body was tight as can be...

And she filled her diaper.

Loudly.

And 5 year old Soapy D says, completely serious...

"It looked like she was using the force!"

(Have I mentioned she's a Star Wars fan?)

Needless to say Bean's been using the force plenty.

-McGee

little MANnerisms

So my littlest sister was in town last week.
Little Man had just walked in from the backyard.
He's 8 now and we're adding to his responsibility list.
He's in charge of cleaning up after the puppy outside each day.

Auntie JoBo...
"Whatcha doing out there buddy?"

Little Man...

"I was just outside picking up poop."

(long pause)

"But not mine."

Ever watch Modern Family?
We have our very own Luke.

And he's adorable.

-McGee

little MANnerisms

It's been awhile.
If you aren't familiar with little MANnerisms click here first:
http://justmcgee.blogspot.com/2010/03/kids.html

Today, completely out of the blue and totally random Soapy D says to me in a near whisper...

"I know most of the time I think about unicorns but sometimes I just think about myself." 

Holding back my laughter in hopes that she would keep going I asked her just what does she think about herself.

"You know like I think what would Soapy D do and what will Soapy D do now and just Soapy D, Soapy D, Soapy D."

And with that she hopped off our bed and went about her day.

Man I love that kid.

And Unicorns.

-McGee

little MANnerisms

Time to ring in the new year with the first little MANerism of 2011.

Mini-McGee, Little Man and I are sitting outside of an In-And-Out Burger waiting for our order.  Little Man notices there are two walk up windows and says...loudly...Mom, that line is for the white people

and that one is for the black people!

(uh.  is it wrong to want to smack your kid?  did I mention there are plenty of people within ear shot?  and he's not quiet.  mortifying.)

Me:

"Dude.  What are you talking about?"

Little Man:

"There used to be two lines."

Me:

(LIGHTBULB) "Are you learning about Martin Luther King Jr in school?"

(Note:  I said it loud enough for the guy three blocks away to hear all the while praying that his answer would be yes so I could get the lady next to me to stop looking at me like I was a crazy racist.)

Little Man:

"YUP!  They used to have two lines and it wasn't nice or fair so on January 17th we celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. day and we fight with our words, not with our fists because with our fists would hurt someone."

Ahhhhhhhhhh...gotta love the thought process of a First Grader.

-McGee

little MANnerisms

Little Miss and Little Man share a bedroom.

Little Miss is 12.  Little Man is 6.

Yet I break up arguments and referee fights often.

Late last night I heard bickering WAY after I had tucked them in.

I walked in to see what was wrong and before I could say a word...

Little Man yells...

"MOM.  Little Miss won't shut her PINEAPPLE."

(read...pie hole)

(Incidentally-I win the mom of the year award for thiis picture.  We were at the store with my little sister when we caught him trying on these glasses.  He didn't want his picture taken in them though.  It was one of those "If you want ice cream you better do this rediculous thing I'm asking you to do and smile while you're at it" kinda thing. 
Hence the lovely look on his cute little face.)

Good times!

-McGee

little MANnerisms

Introducing...Soapy D.

(That's just her gangster name.)

She is our super picky and uber shy kiddo.

But tonight, for dinner,  we mixed it up a bit.

And introduced her to In and Out.

As she finds herself loving her cheeseburger she realizes it looks like a smiley face and prompts me to take a picture of her holding her burger up to her face.

Once I show it to her, she proudly proclaims at the top of her lungs

"That is really cool!  I AM REALLY, REALLY CUTE!"

Followed by silence.
And then hysterical laughing.

Can't teach that kind of self esteem to a teen!
God bless the 3 year olds!

-McGee

little MANnerisms

Nothing like a little MANerism to bring me back.

I should preface this by confessing to you all that Mr. Man is THE cook in the house.  I can bake up a storm for sure but when it comes to dinner let's just say the kids are all disappointed when Mr. Man travels for work because they know mom is in charge of dinner.

So.
Today.

I'm making up some dips we bought at the county fair and the kids are ALL over me.  I wanna try, I want a taste, it's my turn, when is it ready...I snap and say "Enough, everyone out of my kitchen!"

And with total innocent and laking any malice my little man says...
"I thought this was DAD's kitchen."

While the teenagers took a BIG step back and out of the crossfires.

Ahhhhhhh...I love my little man.
Good thing he's cute.

McGee

little MANnerisms

OK.  DISCLAIMER:

Our family lives in a very diverse area and our kids are exposed to all sorts of shapes, colors and sizes.  This kid in particular didn't know how to seperate people according to race until he was in school. 

Even now I think he gets confused.

Reasons to think twice about listening to NPR

in the car with a 6 year old...

Mr. Man took Little Man to a Dodger game a couple weeks ago.  On the way Mr. Man was listening to NPR talk about the new (ass backwards-but that's for another time) legislation passed in Arizona relating to immigrants from Mexico.

Standing at the gates of Dodger Stadium...

Little Man:  Hey Dad?

Mr. Man:  Yeah buddy?

Little Man:  Are Mexican people allowed to be HERE?

Mind you. 

We live in Southern California.

And...

Little Man has one volume level

and it's surely loud enough for public consumption.

Thanks for taking one for the team Mr. Man!

Good times.

-McGee

little MANnerisms

Introducing...Little Man!

So the red bump.

On his forehead.

Wrapping up his bath I tell him he needs to wash the shampoo out of his hair.  Rather than lay back and wash it out he throws himself head first under water to demonstrate that he can hold his breath.  SMACK!  Hits the bottom of the tub with his forehead.

"Sorry dude-still some soap left-try again."

Fully expecting him to lie back.

Nope.

SMACK! 

Again.

I say "wow-that can't have felt good!"

Little man rubs his head and says "No.  It can't."

little MANerisms

Walking out of church on Easter Sunday I ask Little Man what he learned about in his class.

"Jesus, Jesus, Jesus.  Mom.  It's ALWAYS just Jesus."

Well. 
I guess he better get used to it!

-McGee

little MANnerisms

Standing in the doorway to the bathroom Little Man whispers trying hard to get my attention...

"Mom."
"Moooooom"
"Hey mom-I think I need to go see my doctor."

Why buddy?

"I "go" every night and every morning and sometimes too often."

What are you talking about Little Man?

"It was on a commercial today-it said I should see a doctor if I go too much or too often.  And I have to go every day. A lot."

See what I mean?
He is a riot!

-McGee

The start of little MANnerisms

I was asked recently if I write down funny things my kids say.

Keep in mind the oldest kid I've raised is about to graduate from high school-Let's just call him BMOC (Big Man on Campus) he's funny-but too cool to really say silly things these days.

Mini-McGee is always cracking me up.
Mostly because she's a teenager now.

Little Miss is a clever smart ass. 
Don't really know where that came from.

But Little Man.
He is a riot.
Not on purpose, mind you, but a riot none the less.

And then there's Soapy D-or The D-those are her gansta names.  She's Little Man's biggest fan and the two of them together are awesome.

August 15, 2012 edited to add The Bean! She's out little jelly bean, the baby of the family and everyone's favorite sibling. Can't wait to see what she has to say!

So I started writing them down and I think I'll call them...
LITTLE MANerisms. 
Since most of them start or end with Little Man.

They'll pop up every once in awhile.
See the first one in the post below.

Enjoy!

-McGee