Friday, April 8, 2011

older.

Little Man gave me a good long stare down today,
Raised his eyebrows
Squinted his eyes
And proclaimed...
"You DO look a little bigger today, mom!"
Followed up with the sweetest birthday snuggle I could ask for.

It made me long for the days when how tall I am was the most important measure of growth, where age was just about getting to the next one and birthday's were all about cake and presents.  Ok.  Maybe they're still all about cake and presents, Facebook too, by the way. 

(Tangent coming!) 

Had a birthday on Facebook yet?  I kid you not...makes you feel like a rockstar-people you haven't seen or heard from in years wishing you a happy birthday.  It's pure awesome sauce.  I may just change my birthday every couple months so I get a few days a year like this. 

But I digress...

These days I am hyper aware that the most important measure of growth changes somewhere past 18 but before 30.  The personal growth that occurs, however graceful or not, over the course of each year has been painful, slow coming, glorious, freeing, terrifying and exhillerating.  It also reminds me how much more I need to grow!

If you asked me what life would look like now, a year ago, I'm not sure I would tell you I would be where I am.  In fact, I know I wouldn't!  MANY big changes, bumps in the road, growth and blessings have put me where I am today.

Someone said to me the other day that they were on one path but things changed and they were making peace with the fact they were now on another path.  I can't help but wonder, when we think we're making some big, grand change or life has thrown us in what we feel is a different direction, if there isn't a grand design or choreography of life that really just takes our ONE path all over the place.  Is it possible that we aren't constantly changing paths, that this is just PART of the path?

Am I waxing too poetic tonight?
Forgive me.
The wisdom of my whopping 35 years is overwhelming at times.
I can barely contain it.
Or my sarcasm.

So happy birthday to me.
Here's to another year full of opportunites to grow.
Hopefully each year a bit more graceful than the last!

-McGee

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