Sunday, February 9, 2014

walking.

It's an oddly unusual position I'm in.
I have one child who just learned to walk
And one readying herself to walk out into the world.

Several times in life I've thought "It will get easier when..."
Or "Life will be less busy when..."
"Surely things will settle down when..."
But I'm beginning to rethink this.

There is a different type of busy I've experienced at every point in my seventeen years of parenting.  At 20 I had a very active although super sweet step-son for the summer with a newborn baby-I was overwhelmed busy.  When I had a toddler and a baby it was physically busy but I could repeat every Teletubby episode verbatim.  I had a sweet baby boy in the midst of opening a new business and saying goodbye to my grandmother which created a different whirlwind busy.  When I was stressing about one girl starting high school the same year her brother started college, one in middle school, one in elementary, another in pre-K and a baby on the way it was a very panicked "Am I equipped to stretch this way?" type of busy.

And now I find myself here.

The Bean is a walking, talking little toddler who is finding her way in the great big world also known as our house and Mini-McGee is finding her way our into the world at large readying herself for college and beyond.  On any given day I can be cheering at a Varsity basketball game, coaching 6 and 7 year old softball, working on a science project for 4th grade or shopping for teething medication.

It's a mind trip.
A roller coaster ride.
But one I wouldn't trade for the world.

It takes a lot of work to pay the proper amount of attention to each of the five kids under our roof and frankly I'm not always great at it.  I'm not perfect but my priority in life is to be the best mom I can be.  Right now, given the kids we have and the way things run in our house, I'll say I'm feeling pretty good about the job we're doing as parents.

But like with anyone...
Late at night...
I wonder...
I pray...
And I dream about who they are and who they will be.

Tomorrow morning I will wake up with the Bean, change her diaper, make lunches for the elementary crew and see the teenagers off to the high school.

Set up a college tour, arrange for a second knee surgery for the other teen.  Make an 18 month appointment for the baby and play basketball with the boy while waiting for the 6 year old to come home.

It's what life looks like right now.
It's a different kind of busy,
And I'm ok with that!

-McGee

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